Mind You: The World Has Coachella, We Have Food Festivals.
The 7-Up foodies festival, CokeFest (more like FoodiesRUs Fest), Lahore Eat, Karachi Eat, Islamabad Eat and so many others springing up now and then, and all of them are just so exciting. Funny isn’t it, how music is still a long way from the point where food is. Like an original C-D that may cost like a 3-figure sum is expensive but spending the same amount on a pop tart at a carnival is not. Well, this is us, and we have the right to choose our priorities, our way.
So, naturally, we are a long shot away from beating musing festivals but our food festivals are some real competition. Here are 7 times our Food festivals were better and stronger than the Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival:
1. Herpes Vs. Food Poisoning:
We all sin differently, ours was not as permanent. It is a widely known phenomenon that an average of 250 Herpes reports is submitted every year at Coachella. The number of food poisonings? Don’t mean to scandalize sexually transmitted diseases or to wear our moral high priest robe, but, in terms of the misery and the time of the illnesses, I’d go with food poisoning.
2. Exhibit A: Coachella Vs. Islamabad 2019
3. Exhibit B: Justin Beiber Vs. the ones below:
4. Beautiful Larger Than Life Aesthetics:
5. No creepy buzz-killing with giants, Imagine the bad trips it could cause!
6. And all of this, and we haven’t even gotten to the better food, more hygiene, no drug vomit, no spilled garbage cans.
7. No alcohol stink or unshowered hippie human emissions in the form of the collective perspiration from the hot valley sun and open washrooms part.
Next time you hate yourself for not having access to such festivals think twice before and after and see what you have that others don’t. You are lucky too. Cheers. xx