Did you do it? How do you feel? Maybe a tad bit lighter and happier?
Or maybe not. I hope you don’t fall into this category but I know some of my readers do. You may be so deeply rooted into self-criticism that you have grown a thick layer of cynicism, one that you may mistakenly think of as self-protection. How do I know this? Well, experience, of course.
You say a lot of things to yourself: ugly, fat, immature, unorganized, immodest, what ever that may seem negative to you — about yourself. Imagine if you said these same things to someone else; imagine how offended they would be. Exactly! When you wouldn’t offend someone else like that, why would you do it to yourself?
Why Is It So Hard to Accept Yourself?
The easiest answer I can think of is that we confuse approving of ourselves with never changing, never improving and never getting better or getting what we want in life. That’s just preposterous. What do they have to do with each other? Nothing.
Repeat and see for yourself: I accept myself. I love myself. I forgive myself for what I didn’t know until I learned it.
The rule to self-acceptance is simple. No matter what you need to do to accomplish your goals, achieve your dreams, or heck, just get through the day, you do it by approving of yourself first and last. Easy? I don’t know about you but it was one of the hardest shifts in mindset that I have had to cultivate. And oh so worth it.
So you start and end your phrases with “I accept myself” or “I approve of myself” – in effect, you sandwich your thoughts, whatever they may be, in between two powerful phrases that begin to train your mind to think differently about yourself – perhaps with more compassion and even, dare we say, love?
Remember that you are not taking away the hard work, the overcoming of difficulties, the realities of your life, and even the fact that you can improve and get better and grow stronger and wiser and happier, you are simply supporting it all with the power of self-approval and self-acceptance, instead of self-criticism.
Between us, you will begin to feel better after the first day once you realize just how often you criticize and blame and degrade yourself, but let’s just say a week for good measure.
Now go! Go do this right now, go change that negative toxic self-talk in your head and learn one of the most powerful lessons that they should’ve taught us in kindergarten:
Approve of yourself.
But they didn’t. So let us learn it now. Shall we?