You Need To Empathize

We have become so fixated on our need to rise above the rest, to win and succeed that we’ve forgotten how it felt to empathize with another individual. Some healthy competition is nothing out of the ordinary, but we often forget the most basic of emotions when pursuing our goals. Maybe you didn’t have the time to check in with your friend who recently lost her mother, but what was that relief you felt at justifying your disregard for her emotions?

Maybe you just can’t handle death, and maybe you can’t empathize.

Was it crucial proving yourself the smartest man at the expense of somebody else’s feelings? You know you’re intelligent, well-dressed, and accomplished, but what is it you gained by lowering the self-esteem of the teenager who works as an underpaid intern to put himself through college, whereas you are a well-established corporate lawyer?

Is it so great to be “cool?” You’re so cool you’ve isolated the chubby, nerdy girl at the back of the class from the rest because of her music taste, her sense of style. Does it feel good to be at the top of the food chain, the ultimate consumer? It must because there’s no sign of you stopping anytime soon.

In your race to be cool, and smart you’ve forgotten how it feels to be an actual human. You hide your insecurities beneath your cool facade and pretend as if you’ve figured out the world. You’ve seen it all, been it all, and done it all. These people going about their lives in front of you don’t know anything, they’re mainstream. Basic. Dumb.

Perhaps, if you paid more attention to detail you’d have realized long ago how happy they are in their ordinary, basic lives. They like their white picket fences, well-kept lawn, two and a half children and visiting grandmother every weekend.

You’ve learned all the essentials, and have delivered your own prognosis of life but have you ever shared another’s pain? Have you rejoiced with another? Have you let the laughter burst out of you like water from a broken dam? Or are you too cool for that? This dam you’ve built around your emotions will eventually give away, with your emotions bursting out. Will there be anything to absorb the impact of your emotions, or have you driven everything away in your quest to stand alone, and proud?


Feel, and don’t shame others for feeling either. You’re only human and these emotions are meant to be expressed. Stop repressing who you are, and stop forcing others to repress themselves in fear of what you might think.

the alternative is unconsciousness, the default setting!

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